Why I’m Not Trying to Have or Do It All

You hear a lot these days about women wanting to do it all. To have it all. Wanting to have a family and a meaningful career. Wanting to keep up with the latest trends and have dinner on the table by 6pm.

I’m not gonna lie. It tempts me. The idea that we can do and have it all. But is it really an idea? Or an illusion.

This year I’ve been working on one new habit a month. The idea is that much of what we do in our lives is the result of our habits. By changing our habits, we change our lives.

January was all about having more fun. I liked it. It was cute. But I was ready for more for February.

I’ve got big aspirations. I’ve written about them here. To take me closer to what I want to achieve, this month was about keeping up with a weekly publishing schedule. Every week I would publish twice to my blog: once Monday and once Thursday.

So, what did I learn after a month of consistent publishing?

You can’t truly have and do it all.

You can’t, you ask? No. You can’t.

But, you see, that’s just the beauty of it. Why? Because we aren’t wired to have it all. No. In fact, it’s quite the opposite.

As human beings, we’re wired for struggle. We’re wired for challenge. And, ultimately, we’re wired for triumph. But we’re not wired to have it all.

My major challenges this month revolved around time management. How to get more done in the time I had. But I’m starting to realize it isn’t really about getting more done.

Instead, it’s about getting the right things done.

It’s about planning and getting strategic and being clear on what matters to you. On what success means to you, personally, and when and how you can reasonably get there. It’s about focus, not multi tasking. It’s about being present, not daydreaming. It’s about self-care, not burnout.

It’s about taking the time you have and asking: how do I want to spend this, given that I only have so much?

And so, here’s to lessons and sticking to goals and learning and tweaking and not trying to have or do it all.

I’m ready for next month! Are you?

 

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